Clay

Some analogies that the Bible makes are a little bit of a long-shot for me to take to heart, but there is one that rings so true to my life. I only recently realized how much it truly represents me. Totally a mirror of my life. First, however, I'd like to give a little 'stage-setting'. I was raised in a Christian home, with Christian values, and lived them out as well as I knew how. I sat in church, listened to sermons, cried, repented, and went back to my own life. It was natural, comfortable, and relatively painless. It was not until recently that I realized how stubborn I truly am. I'll just say, it's more stubborn than I'd like to admit. I realized I have held on tight, when I should have been letting go. Pardon the cliche, but I'd been comfortable behind the 'wheel' of my life. I had a death-grip on the wheel, asking God to take it. I was white-knuckled, and God in His love always let me have my way. He shakes His head at me, rolls His eyes, knowing what will happen if I pilot myself. He whispers, He does not force His way in. Predictably, I spiral off course on my own with a hardened heart. If you have not yet guessed, my Biblical analogy, the one that fits me best, is clay. If you have ever worked with clay, you know it does not start out pretty. It comes from the ground, underneath layers of earth. I had layers of hurt piled on my sinful heart. Clay has to be 'purified', I was NOT pure. I had twigs, bugs, and pebbles caked into my soul. All those things I held onto, white-knuckled, had to be released (pulled out, rather) in order to be worked with. Once the clay has all the junk out, it is still hard. It takes some pounding, stretching, molding, and kneading out in order to be soft enough to be worked with. I had to be forgiven, humbled, humiliated, and at the end of myself in order to be softened enough to hear God's gentle beckoning to me... to come clean, and come to Him for restoration. At this point, and only at this point, could I be formed into His likeness. Even after being softened, the work is not done. God allows you to be placed in the center of the 'potter's wheel' , that is, His will for your life. Being in the center of God's wheel takes trust, faith, and steadfast commitment. We, as clay, do not possess the ability to see what we will become, but only live in the 'here and now', knowing we are spinning, and that through this spinning, God is shaping us into beauty. This is why I love the analogy of being God's clay. We are lovingly shaped into His treasures, to be filled with His spirit, to reflect His heart, and to be held in His hands. It's wonderful to know that even though we that are delivered go through hardship, we are being shaped through the spinning chaos into God's beautiful creation.

Lord, make me like soft, malleable clay in Your hands. Though I may not see the end result, help me to know that You have it all planned out. You're shaping every detail. Though sometimes I feel like I'm in the center of a 'kiln', it's for perfection, for the sake of making me into who I'm supposed to be. Fill me up with your living waters, so I never thirst. Use me. Amen.